Repressed Memory
by SadaraLochlan
Summary: OC heavy. Contact with a strange telepathic species triggers a repressed memory to struggle to the surface for Sadara Lochlan. Rated M because I have no idea how the subsequent chapters are going to unfold yet.
1. Collapse

Sadara Lochlan trudged into Voyager's engineering section looking like death warmed over. She had seen her morning clients and found herself with an open schedule for the afternoon to assist in other departments. She had been designated the ship's counselor after she was stranded in the Delta Quadrant aboard Voyager and obviously would not be making it to her next command. With only about 140 crewmembers aboard, her schedule was not always full for various reasons. Not everyone needed and/or chose to be seen and those who were seen didn't always have to be seen daily or weekly.

She felt exhausted and anxious and depressed herself as she grabbed one of the standard issue gray repair kits from the storage alcove. It felt impossibly heavy even though it should have felt nearly weightless with her superior Vulcan strength. She was a starship captain at heart so admitting one had a problem necessitating a visit to sickbay did not come naturally or easily to her even when it was logical, but the sleeplessness and disturbing dreams and night terrors were unusual for her and Vulcans in general. Vague images, but sharp emotions lingered long after morning arrived and extensive mediation had yet to identify the source.

Without a word or greeting to anyone, Sadara wearily made her way to the nearest access conduit and keyed the hatch open. She was hoping to avoid conversation with anyone long enough to get herself to sickbay after her task in engineering was completed. The last thing she was looking forward to was anyone else suggesting she pay a visit to sickbay. Vulcans were notoriously stubborn regarding medical matters and frequently denied anything being wrong. The good ship's counselor had no doubt that Torres would insist the doctor make a housecall in engineering if she thought it necessary.

As the hatch hissed open, Sadara gently settled the rectangular kit into the conduit and gave it a light shove, sending it skidding closer to the area she would be working, about halfway down the conduit. Vorik and Torres turned their heads at the noise and looked at each other just as the Vulcan/Human hybrid crawled into the conduit and quietly made her way through the narrow hatchway. Fortunately, she wasn't claustrophobic.

"I didn't even realize she was here," Torres said to Vorik.

That prompted a raised eyebrow from the young Vulcan ensign. "I have spent several hours assisting her with the task you assigned us and she has not been herself since our contact with the Nabarans 5 weeks ago."

"Have you asked her about it?"

"I have not."

Fighting the urge to roll her eyes in frustration, Torres held up a hand. "Look, I know Vulcans prefer not to pry into the personal affairs of other Vulcans, but if you can tell her health is suffering isn't it logical to say something to her?"

Vorik shifted uncomfortably. "As you wish, lieutenant."

"And Vorik…have you ever thought about you and her…?" The Klingon/Human hybrid trailed off, certain that Vorik wouldn't catch her meaning. She almost regretted saying anything.

The dark brown eyes widened slightly in surprise at the suggestion then lowered at memories of the time he'd tried to court the women he was conversing with now.

"I am obviously inept at pursuing women. I would not care to repeat the experience."

Exiting out of his work at the station he was working on, he grabbed his own kit and followed after Sadara into the hatch, leaving Lt. Torres to ponder that.

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The impossibly young Vulcan male found Sadara stretched out on her right side, facing the wall of the conduit with a panel open in front of her and a tricorder in her hands, studying the readings.

"Counselor?"

"You can call me Sadara. I think we've been working on this project long enough to ditch the constant formality."

"Since that is your wish, perhaps you'd care to discuss what has been disrupting your health. You have not been yourself since this ship came in contact with Nabarans. As they are a rather intrusively telepathic race, I can only speculate that you had some sort of negative experience as a result of contact with them."

Slowly palming her tricorder shut, Sadara pondered her response and sat up.

"I was taken on that mission for obvious reasons; experience with diplomacy as a starship captain and I have my education and training in exopsychology. Intrusively telepathic is an understatement, but what I learned was that they can only use their telepathic abilities on species who are also telepathic."

"The others were unaffected," Vorik said.

"Save for me and Tuvok. I maintain low level shields nearly all of the time as a precaution. I raise them completely when making first contact with alien races and it was no different in the case of Nabarans. Admittedly, I'm not the most talented at Vulcan mental abilities, but I've had more than enough practice over my lifetime. The Nabarans cut through my shields like a knife through warm butter. The pain was momentary, but since then I've experienced nightly night terrors and lingering feelings of anxiety. I can't place the images, but it almost feels like a memory rather than a dream. It's difficult to explain; the images aren't familiar, but they feel like they should be."

"A repressed memory?"

"Exactly. I know. I've already decided to visit sickbay once we're finished here. I looked in the mirror this morning and it's getting increasingly difficult to hide that I have not slept recently. I don't know what he can do for me though. I think this might require a Vulcan healer and the closest one is 70 years way."

Vorik's eyebrow lifted in surprise. "If you believe that your situation might require a Vulcan healer then you should not delay seeing the doctor. The project can wait; I will accompany you to sickbay."

"Seriously, I can finish this first. What's one more hour?" Sadara snapped her tricorder open again, wincing against the trilling and chirping sounds that seemed to so easily irritate her these days. The lights emanating from it seemed painfully bright to her exhausted eyes.

"Sadara, do not make me carry you down there."

A tired smirk lifted the corner of her carefully painted nude lips. "You wouldn't dare. I would go kicking and screaming as all starship captains do. I'm certain you do not wish that much attention drawn to you."

"Your health must take precedence so I will endure the discomfort if necessary," he smirked back slightly and the teasing humor shone in his big brown eyes.

"Or we could draw the attention to you by asking the doctor to make a rare visit to engineering. And I must point out that you are not the captain here so it is unnecessary and counterproductive for you to appear indestructible."

Sadara realized she could continue the argument for the sake of being stubborn, but Vorik had slept, she had not and would soon not have the energy to continue trying to out-stubborn a steadfast Vulcan. Reluctantly, she closed her tricorder and replaced it in the kit she brought with her, then wearily pushed passed the raven haired Vorik to hop out of the conduit. She moved to the side out his way and leaned against the wall, letting her eyelids fall closed for a moment, seeing those same images from her night terrors float across her mind's eye. The emotions of dread and panic that accompanied it felt like they were choking her. For an instant, the room swam and Sadara was sure her knees were going to buckle until she felt herself being lifted in someone's arms, probably Vorik's, but she was barely aware of the external world by then.

About thirty feet away, Lt. Torres had watched the scene unfold in what felt like an eternity yet also felt like it had happened in a heartbeat.

"Torres to sickbay."

"Go ahead, lieutenant," came the doctor's cheerful voice.

"Ensign Vorik is headed your way with Counselor Lochlan. She fainted or something. Vorik should have more details for you when he gets there."

"Fainted?! That's rather quaint, especially for a Vulcan female."

"Passed out. Whatever," Torres growled impatiently, her infamous Klingon temper bubbling to the surface. There was always a snarky little quip with him.

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Vulcans were touch telepaths and as Vorik made the journey to sickbay with Sadara in his arms, he caught glimpses of what she'd been enduring the last month and a half. Closest to the surface were the feelings associated with the night terrors she'd been having. There was an urgency to the emotions; dread, panic, an urge to flee or strike back, a knowing of what was coming, but lacking an ability to stop it. The faces and events were blurrier. There were many of them, all with pointed ears, but the facial features were less clear.

At first Vorik surmised that the night terrors might simply be coincidental to the timing of the meeting with Nabarans and that the dreams were simply a manifestation of her discomfort around Vulcans. Perhaps the Nabarans unforeseen telepathic breech of her shields had allowed less pleasant emotions to emerge in her dreams. But he wondered if possibly it was the reverse. The contact may have triggered a repressed memory to struggle to the surface and that her discomfort with Vulcans stemmed from whatever happened in the memory she was repressing.

There were also impressions of other feelings he was picking up on, some of which surprised him as they pertained to him. He resolved to meditate on the discovery later as he realized he wasn't sure how he to react to it. And with Sadara in her condition he had time to contemplate the matter.

He was shocked somewhat at how light she was, but he wrote that off to the lighter gravity aboard ship. On Vulcan, she would have felt heavier to him. Entering sickbay, his eyes scanned the large room for the holographic doctor who came out of his office and gestured to a biobed. The monitors activated as Sadara was gently placed on the bed. Her head fell to the side as a result of the updo she'd had her long, chocolate brown hair in.

The holographic doctor hovered over Sadara with a tricorder and raised a sarcastic eyebrow in the male Vulcan's direction. He couldn't believe he was going to have to prompt details out of the stoic young man, waiting patiently with his arms clasped behind his back.

"So…," he began with mock chipperness. "Care to fill me in, Ensign?"

In excruciating, but succinct detail, Vorik described his observations and the events of the last several weeks.

"Well… I don't know that a Vulcan healer is absolutely necessary. You and/or Mr. Tuvok likely have the necessary skills to unlock this mystery of the elusive memory."

For the second time that day, the young Vulcan engineer shifted with discomfort. "I am inexperienced, doctor. I could make matters worse for her if I make a mistake."

"Practice makes perfect," the doctor quipped just as cheerfully as he had earlier. And it would be safer for both of you if you were to do this now while she is unconscious as she won't be fighting you. Ensign, if this is a repressed memory fighting to the surface the sooner it happens the better it is for her recovery. She has to recall it in order to deal with it."

Glancing down at Sadara's prone form, Vorik took a deep breath and willed calm.

"Very well, doctor. I'll need a few minutes to prepare."

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	2. Mind Meld

After a short time of mediation, Vorik rose from the biobed next to Sadara and approached her.

_This task should have been delegated to Tuvok; he has more experience._

Gently, the young man leaned over Sadara's still form and placed one hand on each side of her drawn, pale face. His fingers found the psi points instinctively and he directed his concentration to unlocking the repressed memory, if that was indeed what it was. It did not take long to find it being that it was now close to the surface; and Vorik began the difficult and tedious task of unraveling the binds that hid the memory from Sadara's conscious mind. It felt like trying to untangle a necklace chain with multiple tiny knots and each one took patience and persistence.

What Vorik was concerned about was if Sadara attempted to wake during his efforts. He did not yet know the content of the memory and she could be triggered to any kind of behavior when the memory was fully restored.

Vorik was vaguely aware of the holographic doctor hovering nearby, monitoring their neurologic activity, but he couldn't afford to be distracted. Time flew by and yet felt at a standstill as the young Vulcan continued loosening her unconscious mind's grip on the long lost memory.

With each successful attempt, the images and feelings in the memory became sharper. As it was her memory, Vorik experienced it from her point of view which was a bit disconcerting.

_An aging Vulcan with sapphire blue eyes the same color as Sadara's drifted into view as she came to finally. Where her eyes held a comforting warmth, his eyes were ice cold and chilling to the soul. With courage and determination, a twenty two year old Sadara Lochlan repressed the shudder that threatened to course through her prone body. She wished to learn more about her surroundings and try to ascertain where she was being held, but she continued to hold her captor's gaze defiantly. It would do no good to appear intimidated even if that wasn't the case._

_"Do you know who I am?" He asked with mild amusement as he looked her over._

_She arched an eyebrow at him. "An asshole?" She spat in flawless Vulcan, liquid blue fury blazing in her eyes._

_The nearly white haired old man's smirk widened. "You are obviously well acquainted with your humanity, I see. At least your wayward mother troubled herself to teach you Vulcan as well."_

_"What do you know of my mother?!" _

_"Well enough to know she spurned her betrothed in favor of an uncivilized, untamed qomi. I am Solara's grandfather; your great grandfather. It would have been an advantageous political match that would have benefited our family greatly. And Sodan was quite fond of her. Your mother chose selfishly and now you are going to pay for her choices. Perhaps when she sees how her actions have affected her child, she will realize the errors of her ways."_

_"Exacting revenge on her is hardly logical as the past cannot be altered or have you become so senile that logic is now as foreign to you as acceptance and forgiveness? Taking it out on an innocent is just as illogical."_

_"I am an old man. I'll do what I wish now. Because of what your mother did, Sodan and I both joined the Vulcan Isolationist Movement. My family's political connections were damaged by Solara's rebellious ways and she sullied my line with qomi blood. My purpose now is only to restore the purity of Vulcan families, even though the purity of mine will never be restored."_

_Raising a gnarly hand, the old man beckoned to someone out of Sadara's field of vision. A decent looking Vulcan male appeared on the other side of the bed Sadara had been restrained to. He looked unwell though. He looked pale and clammy and his large brown eyes were feverish as they raked over her prone form. His thin frame shook slightly, though he was valiantly trying to fight it._

_In an instant it hit Sadara like a ton of bricks and her breath caught in her throat. Sodan didn't get her mother so he was going to have the daughter. But did that mean just to slake the pon farr that he was so obviously suffering from or did he plan something far more permanent and vengeful?_

_A deep, amused chuckle escaped from Sadara's great grandfather. _

_"The spitting image of her mother, just as I said she'd be." _

_Sodan couldn't deny that. Sadara was built just like Solara the same full hips, impossibly long legs, and the large sapphire eyes and full lips._

_The Vulcan/Human hybrid's great grandfather left which somehow only served to deepen the feeling of dread festering in her belly like a dead weight._

_"Don't touch me!" She hissed, her eyes flashing blue fire at him. She struggled against the restraints with all her might, but couldn't even budge them._

_"Don't be illogical and accept the situation. By struggling you are wasting energy in a futile endeavor. You belong to me now." Sodan reached toward Sadara's face searching out the psi points…_

The holographic doctor's eyebrows knit together in agitation and concern as Sadara's cortical readings and heart rate spiked dramatically. Vorik felt the moment she woke and braced himself for the struggle he was sure was coming. Her wide eyes flew open, but she was only aware of the hands on her face just as in her memory and she struggled hard and desperately against Vorik, trying to disengage the mental contact. He sent her calming thoughts and attempted to relay the pertinent information to her in the hopes she would calm long enough for him to safely disengage the mind meld.

After what seemed an eternity, Sadara focused on Vorik's face and recognized him. She willed herself to take a deep, calming breath and let it out slowly, though she was shaking like a leaf. Vorik was feeling rather shaken himself. Logically, retrieving the memory was necessary for her health and recovery, but Vorik couldn't help but think he'd violated her just as Sodan had simply by being privy to such a personal experience. Not knowing what else he could do, he simply held her in a very unVulcan gesture until she calmed. Meanwhile the doctor was also calming somewhat as her readings stabilized.

Unbelievably, a small burst of laughter escaped Sadara and it sounded inappropriate and out there even to her own ears, but she knew it was just her way of coping.

"Are you sure you don't want to find out what happens next, Vorik?" She chuckled in that self deprecating way she had as she realized she'd come out of it in the middle of the memory.

"I did," he whispered painfully. "The meld wasn't immediately severed. I am aware of most of it, if not all of it. What happened to you was..." He turned away from her and lowered his head. "There are no words that would not be a vast understatement."

"I will adjust to it in time."

Clenching his fists, Vorik turned back to her, his deep brown eyes alight with anger. "Instead of allowing you to face it, the healers buried that memory in order to protect the Vulcan reputation of being a peaceful race."

"There are bad eggs in every crowd, Vorik. That action seems illogical and hypocritical to me too, but it is what it is."

Clearing his throat behind Sadara, the doctor smiled in that mock sincere way he had. "I'm still here and last I checked I was still the doctor!"

Sadara looked back with a smirk. "Does that mean I'm discharged now?"

"Your readings have returned to normal, but I want you to spend some time in mediation and if the nightmares return, let me know. I'm assuming I don't have to lecture you on what you already know."

"I am well versed in the psychology, doctor," Sadara returned, hopping off the biobed.

"Oh and you're off duty for the next few days while you're "adjusting," the doctor smirked infuriatingly in Sadara's direction. "I am well versed in stubborn starship captains pushing themselves too hard."

Vorik looked at Sadara with a raised eyebrow. She simply scowled.

"I hate it when they do that…"


	3. Cover Ups

Sadara entered her quarters and leaned against the wall next to the door as it hissed shut behind her. Her head fell back and she stared up at the ceiling, almost too tired to move. She was exhausted, but dared not contemplate what dreadful images her mind would summon if she allowed her eyes to drift closed.

Finally, she stood up straight and went over to the small table next to her meditation cushion and lit the scented candle, illuminating slightly the darkened room and casting flickering shadows about her quarters. For a moment she worried that the shadows cast by the candle would increase her anxiety, but curiously she still felt only the usual comfort it brought her. What she really wanted was a mug of piping hot chocolate, but the psychologist in her reminded herself that chocolate was an intoxicant and that getting drunk was absolutely the wrong way to deal with this heinous memory no matter how stark the awful clarity.

Inhaling the sweet fragrance of french vanilla that wafted gently from the ivory candle, Sadara padded off to her bedroom to change into a light blue satin slip. Her thoughts churned as she pulled her hair out of its french twist and ran a brush through the long dark brown strands.

For the first time in her life, the Vulcan/Human hybrid felt anxious and jumpy at being alone, but she tried to shake off such illogical feelings. The events in her recovered memory occurred over a century ago and the perpetrators were not on board Voyager. Vorik had escorted her back to her quarters and he had lingered a few moments with uncertainty clouding his expression. She knew he was contemplating the wisdom of leaving her alone with such a shocking and revolting revelation, but his Vulcan nature also demanded he not involve himself inappropriately in her personal affairs. She put on a light smile she didn't really feel and managed to convince the tall young man that with a little sleep and meditation she'd be good as new. He had departed hesitantly.

Pushing her hair back behind her shoulders, Sadara gracefully lowered herself onto her couch and stretched out with a light blanket over her. She wasn't yet ready to move to her bedroom yet, preferring to bathe calmly in the flickering candlelight in the main room. Before she realized it, she had fallen into a deep sleep.

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Ensign Vorik returned to his quarters intent on meditating. The mind meld with Counselor Lochlan had left him somewhat unsettled and he needed to restore the balance. Prior to the normally energetic hybrid's collapse in engineering, Vorik had started to reconsider B'elanna's suggestion that he look at Sadara as a potential mate, but after discovering the horror of Sadara's repressed memory the raven haired Vulcan wondered if she could ever open up to another Vulcan man. Surely there would be repercussions from the revelation; and changes in her attitudes and behaviors toward Vulcans as a result.

_Not necessarily,_ he reminded himself. _Most certainly she understands that it is illogical to blame an entire race for the heinous acts of a few._

Still, she was half human and had moments of illogic. It was hard to say how these recovered memories would affect her. For a moment, Vorik considered discussing the issue with the older and wiser Lieutenant Tuvok, but just as quickly dismissed the idea. The slim engineer preferred to be as self sufficient as possible and resolved to navigate the treacherous waters of shipboard socialization as best he could on his own.

And in her own way, B'elanna was trying to help. After what occurred between them during Vorik's first pon farr, she had a fair understanding of what his obstacles were while Voyager was stranded in the Delta Quadrant. And she was being logical in encouraging him to look now rather than wait until his situation became urgent again in six years. It was a situation Vorik never thought to be in. He had been bonded at seven years old as most Vulcan children were. It was only after Voyager became stranded 70 years from home that his situation had changed. He discovered the hard way that courtship rituals among non Vulcans were more challenging, fraught with emotional peaks and valleys, and lasted for longer periods of time. Perhaps if he'd taken more time with B'elanna things would have worked out better. It was logical for him to start looking now and Sadara, being half Vulcan, would be the most logical choice as he would have to adjust his own behaviors the least in pursuit of her. Sadara would understand where B'elanna had not.

By the time he had reached his quarters, Vorik resolved to refrain from anymore speculation. He lacked sufficient information at the moment to decide how to proceed one way or the other. The most logical course of action was to simply be patient and see how she responded to him after she'd had time to process her newfound memories. Satisfied that he'd at least put that train of thought to rest, he decided to put off the mediation until morning. He was exhausted from the mind meld earlier in the day and decided that rest was paramount.

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_Sadara came to slowly. Muffled voices gradually became clearer, a few of which she recognized as her parents and maternal grandparents. She tried to open her eyes, but they felt glued shut from exhaustion. She wasn't registering pain though she did feel sore all over. Inhaling deeply she noted that it smelled like a hospital in her room and concluded that must be where she was at._

_But how did I come to be here? _

_She searched her memory, but the images were foggy. And something was missing. She felt alone. Her mind felt the uncomfortable absence in the same way a person felt the absence of a limb. It just didn't feel right._

_"The bond is gone…" she muttered weakly. "Why is the bond gone?"_

_Sorel, Sadara's maternal grandfather lowered himself into the chair next to her bed and spoke softly._

_"The bond was forced upon you. A Healer has severed it. It will feel uncomfortable for a time, but you will adjust," _

_Unable to keep herself awake, Sadara drifted off again having barely registered her grandfather's words._

_Looking up, Sorel fixed his dark blue eyes on his daughter, Solara, then stood and beckoned her to follow him out into the brightly lit hallway. "Summon the healer again. Her memory of the bond will need to be suppressed as well or she will likely work to solve the mystery. It is best for all involved if she never recalls the events of the last few days. She is half Human and will likely not cope with such an ordeal in the Vulcan way. The exposure of such violence on Vulcan to outsiders is unconscionable. And she herself would not do well to develop an irrational fear of Vulcan males as a result of this experience."_

_Brian Lochlan stood rigidly across from his father in law with a scowl of frustration marring his normally calm features._

_"Wouldn't the truth be better than an elaborate cover up and mind meld? Just because she knows the truth doesn't mean she'll speak of it. She has the right to know what's happened to her."_

_"Normally I would agree, Brian, but in this case the good of Vulcan must take precedence. And would you wish your daughter to suffer with that memory the rest of her life when it is unnecessary?"_

_Snorting in disgust, Brian Lochlan stalked off to go take a walk outside. There was no point in continuing to argue with Sorel. After nearly 25 years of marriage to Solara, Brian knew how to choose his battles._


	4. Contemplations

Sipping some hot tea, Sadara poured over her client notes for the day. There were three crewmembers on her schedule for the day, which was a very light schedule compared to the numbers she saw when she'd practiced on Earth at Starfleet Command a century prior. Her memory was as sharp as any Vulcan's yet she still felt it best practice to review her notes prior to her appointments regardless.

Homesickness was the issue she dealt with primarily aboard Voyager for obvious reasons. Interpersonal issues and boredom due to the same insipid routines were also prevalent topics. The latter two issues prompted Voyager's counselor to suggest crew assignment rotations and cross training across departments. Not only would this alleviate boredom, but it would help ensure that all hands were knowledgeable and properly trained to fill in anywhere on the ship as needed. While each life was unique and valuable, the fact of the matter was that Voyager was unable to acquire new Starfleet officers to replace crew that would inevitably be lost on the journey back to the Alpha Quadrant.

As a former starship captain herself, Sadara was only too familiar with the painful loss of crewmembers killed in action. Many times she had spent in silent contemplation on the observation deck of the Aries wondering if she had missed something that might have precipitated a different outcome. Inevitably though, her Vulcan half would stir gently to remind her that such reflection was pointless and would not change the past. Her Vulcan half irritated her in such matters, not so much that it was correct, but more because it was so cold and unfeeling. Her human half felt that each person lost under her command deserved at least a few moments in her thoughts.

She leaned back in her chair, lost in thought, and brought the warm mug of tea to her full, pink lips. She winced slightly in distaste at the bitter taste, chuckling slightly when her Vulcan half wondered why she was drinking something she disliked.

_Because chocolate is an intoxicant to Vulcans and I think it's best if I steer clear of it until I've had a chance to absorb this whole resurfaced memory situation._

Counselor Sadara Lochlan was a firm believer in absolutely no potentially habit forming substances specifically after a traumatic event. Since she expected this of her clients it went double for her. One mug of hot chocolate or one candy bar used for comfort during a trying time could all too easily turn into a crutch with denial paving the way to addiction. She'd seen the self destructive results only too often with alcohol and drugs in humans and some other species. They never helped or solved the problem; they just made the problem easier to live with for a short while.

She grimaced through another sip reflecting that she really did not enjoy bitter tasting drinks, but she needed something hot, particularly in the mornings. Her Vulcan physiology found the ship's temperature rather cold and she often wore a heating pad on her back to compensate.

The unexpected chirp of her door chime interrupted the flowing river of her thoughts and she set her cooling mug down on the silver hued table in front of her.

"Come in," she called as she powered down her computer terminal with a tap of a button.

A surprised and slightly amused smile quirked her lips as the door hissed open to reveal her visitor.

"Ensign Vorik, a surprise to see you in this neck of the woods. How can I be of assistance?"

"Actually that was to be my question of you, Counselor," Vorik said as he gently dropped himself into the chair across from her. "However, I too am experiencing some discomfort from the experience."

Sadara nodded, leaning toward him with concern. "The doctor did mention to me that you appeared unsettled. Perhaps we can find a way to help each other here. In what ways has the experience troubled you?"

Vorik also leaned forward with his elbows resting on his knees and his long fingers steepled in front of him.

"I confess I'm not as experienced with mind melds and adjusting to the after effects as perhaps Lieutenant Tuvok is. I am aware that mind melds involve the sharing of thoughts obviously, but in retrieving your repressed memory I learned something about you that you yourself had no prior knowledge of. It is not logical but I can't help but think I've violated you just as Sodan had done. I should not have become privy to that when you yourself had no knowledge."

Sadara shook her head as she picked up her mug for another sip of tea.

"Please don't do that to yourself. You had no idea what you were going to find so it would be illogical to dwell on it, you know this. Besides, it was necessary in order to restore my health. Like most everyone on board, I cannot function effectively if I'm not properly rested and given my profession any incapacitation on my part can negatively impact my clients. Your assistance was only logical and for the good of the many."

The Vulcan/Human hybrid watched the younger Vulcan for a long moment. Vulcans often did not give off many cues in terms of body language and Sadara surprisingly had to go on gut instinct sometimes in order to identify issues with them.

Cocking her head to the side, she peered at him with concern.

"This is just a wild stab in the dark, but I sense something else is troubling you."

Vorik's eyebrows flew up into his bangs.

"Your instincts do you credit, counselor. All Vulcans are aware of the Vulcan Isolationist Movement, but I admit I did not give much thought to them. What was told regarding them was that they remained a fairly small group of dissidents and were considered largely harmless and ineffective in altering the stance of the Vulcan government. But what happened to you was anything but harmless. I was unprepared for the emotional and illogical actions of your great grandfather and Sodan."

A small smile tugged at the corners of Sadara's mouth and her blue eyes lit up with interest. It wasn't often she heard a Vulcan speak so freely and she found it refreshing, especially as he was young and open minded.

"Fear is usually the catalyst for such strong actions and reactions, Vorik. Fear of the unknown, fear of what's different, fear of change, fear of losing control, and sometimes it's even fear of oneself. Fear can often precipitate offensive action in someone in the hopes of asserting dominance or control over the feared entity, which is often contrary to what many people expect. They imagine fear paralyzing someone into inaction or making them run away. That said, fear may be only one factor of several in why the VIM does what it does. I'm certain they have logical arguments for wishing the isolation of Vulcan. Surak forbid Vulcan families be tainted with alien blood."

Vorik leaned back slightly as his eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

"Forgive me, counselor, but you appear remarkably untroubled by the revelation. I do not wish to offend, but I anticipated a more emotional response given your human half."

"No offense taken," she chuckled as she got up to ask the replicator for some cranberry juice this time, then looked in Vorik's direction, gesturing to the replicator.

Vorik raised an eyebrow and decided to be adventurous. "What you're having will be fine."

"I think you'll like it. Vulcans enjoy strongly flavored foods and cranberry juice can be rather tart," she said matter of factly and handed him the newly replicated glass.

Vorik took the glass gingerly and paused a moment, peering curiously into the almost wine colored liquid. He took a cautious sip.

"The flavor is most agreeable."

Smiling Sadara lowered herself into her chair again, this time leaning back fully and savoring her favorite cold beverage.

"In response, I cannot say I have been unaffected by the recovery of the repressed memory. I have spent the last few days processing it as well as I am able. Ironically, I've been approaching it in a more Vulcan way than I'm normally accustomed to. Those events happened over a century ago. I've lived most of my life in the absence of that memory. I don't see much value in dwelling on it or allowing it to color my perceptions and experiences in the present. I can't go back and change it and the perpetrators aren't in my life presently anyway. I think for me, the hardest part will be adjusting to the added vulnerability which is an uncomfortable emotion for me. There is some anger at the cover up, but again, that is not something I can affect at this juncture. It is best dismissed as irrelevant now."

"So you would not object to the possibility of another Vulcan mate?"

Sadara shook her head, surprised at the rather personal direction the young, raven haired Vulcan had taken the conversation.

"Of course not. It would be absurd to hold an entire race of beings hostage for the actions of a few; though I'm surprised that you're concerned about that. Something else you want to talk about?"


	5. Only Logical

**Short chapter, sorry.**

The conversation with Vorik had ended with his polite, but abrupt departure. He had appeared uncomfortable and were it possible for a Vulcan, almost mortified at the personal question he'd asked her. No doubt he was chastising himself for asking her if she was interested in taking another Vulcan husband or husband of any race for that matter. Vulcans would consider that none of his business unless Pon Farr was on the horizon, which in his case wouldn't be for close to six years.

Sadara could feel nothing but sympathy for his situation. Most Vulcans would have meditated and dismissed the preoccupation with finding a mate until the Pon Farr was nearer; but in Vorik's situation, so far from home he was faced with the challenge of navigating the treacherous seas of human courtship rituals in order to secure a mate. Logically he felt compelled to consider these things now accompanied by a fear that no woman on Voyager would want him.

Vulcans didn't engage in small talk so he'd obviously been probing to see if there was a possibility she'd have him. They would be working together on that project again in engineering in a few days; Sadara would have to talk to him about it then regardless of the discomfort. She'd developed feelings for him over the months they'd been working together and he wanted a wife. Surely he'd see the logic in bonding with her.

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Her last counseling session had run over slightly so when Sadara arrived in Engineering she assumed Vorik would already be sequestered away in the conduit they'd been working in for the last few months. Grabbing her kit, she peeked into the conduit and found the young Vulcan busily tapping away at a console. He stopped momentarily as his keen Vulcan hearing detected her crawling through the conduit.

"Greetings, counselor," he said. His attempt to keep his voice neutral failed to Sadara's amusement. He sounded like he was actually gratified to see her. The possibility made her heart skip a few beats as if the absolute rest of everything about him didn't already threaten to reduce her concentration to the barest tattered shreds.

_I'm probably the only Vulcan alive who can claim to suffer from such a malady…_, she thought ruefully.

Falling in love with a Vulcan had to be the worst irony fate had to offer. Logic might win him over, but the human half of her lamented that he might never really love her. She sighed, then looked away, feeling a blush of monumental proportions spread through her like a wildfire.

Next to her, Vorik shifted uncomfortably. "I know of your… feelings for me," he said after a moment, watching her reaction carefully.

A heavy sigh escaped her and she turned her attention back to the console in front of them.

"My apologies. I thought I had sufficiently masked them. It was not my intention to bring you any discomfort."

"I happened by them unintentionally when I carried you to sickbay. Your shields were lowered otherwise I would never have learned of them."

Turning to him, she put her tricorder down for a moment as something dawned on her.

"That's why you asked if I'd ever consider taking another Vulcan husband?"

"Yes," he said, his deep baritone almost a whisper as he turned away from her, shame coloring his handsome face.

Sadara shook her head in confusion and reached out to touch his shoulder, but pulled her hand back at the last second, remembering that Vulcans preferred not to be touched.

"Why the self recrimination?"

"Because my first thought after learning of your feelings was that I could use them to gain you as my mate. My survival depends on having a wife, but it is still revolting that my first impulse was a selfish one."

Compassion and empathy shone warmly in Sadara's sapphire blue eyes.

"I completely understand so don't be too hard on yourself. It may have felt selfish, but it was also logical. The one who already has feelings for you is the most likely to agree to be your wife."

"Precisely. So will you?" Vorik's dark brown eyes were hopeful. He wasn't sure of his feelings yet, but as a Vulcan, logic was how he made his decisions. The woman next to him wanted him, loved him even, and could provide him with the stable relationship he needed and craved. And he'd looked forward to being in her company.

Rather surprised by his boldness, Sadara's eyebrows flew up into her hairline, but shocked joy danced merrily in her sapphire eyes.

"Yes," she whispered softly as she extended two fingers to him which he met with his own in the traditional Vulcan "kiss."

Unbeknownst to them, Voyager's esteemed chief engineer had accidentally caught the last few moments, but despite her initial guilt she couldn't resist.

"Okay you two lovebirds, back to work." At Vorik's raised eyebrow, Torres shrugged with a sly smile. "Hey, that's what you get for cockblocking Tom at the luau."


	6. Love and Marriage

**Honestly I'm not liking this chapter very much, but I'm not sure what it needs yet. I may edit it or rewrite it if I find something I like better.**

"Seriously?!" Sadara stared at Vorik in disbelief. "You want to go through the standard Terran wedding ceremony? Have you read the vows for those? Do you have any idea how many times you will have to utter the word love in front of witnesses?"

"Indeed. It should prove to be an intriguing experience. I admit I am mystified that you aren't more enthusiastic about it yourself as you are half Human."

Putting her tiny hands up in surrender, Sadara shook her head and chuckled. "Your choice, but don't say I didn't warn you. I have no issues simply having a Vulcan ceremony, but I certainly wouldn't wish to deprive you of an experience you're looking forward to."

"Dress uniform, correct?" He rifled through his closet quickly making certain that the dress uniform he so rarely wore was still in pristine condition.

"Yes. I'll find a suitable dress to wear. I'm not really interested in wearing my dress uniform to my own wedding."

She continued on making supper as she had promised she would for him earlier that day. It had been some time since she'd prepared a Vulcan dish and she hoped she wasn't too rusty. The meal was something of a tradition on Vulcan when the female took the initiative and offered herself in marriage to the male; it signified her desire and willingness to care for him for the rest of their lives. Well, in their case it was more likely the case that she would until she passed on as she was quite a bit older than him.

"What if we tried to combine the two ceremonies somehow? Vulcan ceremonies tend to be short and to the point. I'm sure we could work in the bonding somewhere during the Terran ceremony? You could wear Vulcan garb rather than sling your neck in the dress uniform?"

Vorik pondered that a moment with a raised eyebrow. "I agree the idea has merit. We can explore it in more detail after the evening meal."

The wedding was a fairly quiet affair a few days later, combining both Human and Vulcan traditions. Surprisingly it had worked out better than they expected with few snags. Both had chosen traditional Vulcan wedding garb, especially as Sadara had no desire to wear anything overly frilly and cumbersome as many human brides chose to do. Such an outfit wouldn't have been appropriate for her third wedding anyway.

Vorik now followed Sadara into the quarters they now shared, eager to get down to the business of the wedding night; and judging from the sensations he was getting from their newly forged marriage bond, his new bride was in a similar mood. Reaching for the fastenings of her vibrant, magenta hued dress, he slowly undid them as he pressed his lips to her neck. Her head fell back against his shoulder and tilted toward him for a deep, passionate kiss as her arm snaked up to caress the back of his head.

Finally, Vorik undid the final clasp and tugged the dress off her body, letting it pool in a dark pink pile at her feet. Shrugging off his own robes, he lifted her in his arms and carried her into the adjacent room to deposit her on the bed. He finished disrobing quickly, and then gently settled himself over her, raining gentle kisses over her body.

Through the bond, the young Vulcan male felt Sadara's impatience to get things moving. This was surprising to him as he thought women preferred lovemaking to be slow with emphasis on the foreplay. He finished divesting her of her heels and undergarments and entered her swiftly, savoring the low growl of satisfaction that tore from her throat.

"Ashaya…" she breathed. "My adun… I love you…"

Vorik awoke first the following morning. He was used to an earlier schedule than she was so was used to being up early. Today and for the next few days however, they were technically considered on their honeymoon even though there wasn't anywhere for them to get away from their everyday lives save for the holodeck.

Beside him he could hear her gentle breathing as she slept. She was curled up against him, her soft hands resting against his chest. He continued to hold her for a few more moments, but soon he would have to free his right arm from under her head as his arm was "falling asleep."

Brushing her long brown hair back from her face, he planted a gentle kiss on her forehead and carefully slid his arm out from under her head. A sigh escaped her as her head sank back against the soft pillows.

He breathed a sigh of relief as he sat up, gazing at his new wife. There would be no more fretting about what he would do when his pon farr reared its ugly head again. His mind flashed back to the night before, particularly when she told him she loved him. It still seemed surreal to him that she'd come to feel that way about him. He had married her for logical reasons; to secure a mate to see him through his pon farrs, but he had meant every word of his marriage vows. He was certain that, to the ability Vulcans had, he loved her as well.

He hoped marriage to him wouldn't disappoint her. And perhaps one day there would even be children.


	7. USS Soval

**Short Chapter, sorry.**

The newly bonded couple returned to their respective duties a short three days later; just in time for the newest adventure to begin. Sensors had detected a faint Starfleet signature emanating from a nearby M class planet. The weak distress signal the ship was repeatedly broadcasting was on a frequency Starfleet hadn't used in nearly 40 years. In fact, Ensign Harry Kim was having difficulty extracting much information from the signal at all; they still had no clue what the registry number and class of starship it was. Only a rough time frame of the vessel's origin gave them any clue; at least until they ventured down there. But there was no telling what condition the ship was in and if anyone was still alive.

How a Federation vessel from earlier in the century managed to make it to the Delta Quadrant was something Captain Janeway was very curious about.

Lieutenant Tom Paris maneuvered the Intrepid class Voyager into standard orbit around the planet where the Starfleet signature had been detected. Janeway's dark blue eyes fairly gleamed with excitement and curiosity.

"I'm detecting faint life signs… they appear to be Vulcan" Harry Kim said as he interpreted the readings coming through on his console. He punched in a few more commands that ran another series of scans over the ship and nearby areas.

"It looks like an Oberth class starship, Captain; the Soval."

That prompted a raised eyebrow from Janeway's Vulcan tactical officer and longtime friend, Tuvok.

"The Soval was reported missing in 2330 after a sudden encounter with a wormhole. She and her all Vulcan crew were eventually declared lost."

"Can we hail them?" Janeway looked to Kim.

"I'll give it a try, ma'am," Kim nodded and tapped in a few more commands. "No response. They may not have the power to keep such a seldom used function running."

Janeway turned toward Chakotay. "Assemble an away team, Commander. I'm curious to find out how they got here and what they've been doing for the last 40 years."

"Right away, captain," the dark eyed, dark haired Chakotay said rising from his chair next to the center seat.

"Tuvok, are you up for meeting some fellow Vulcans today?"

"Indeed. And might I suggest Counselor Lochlan and Ensign Vorik accompany us? Counselor Lochlan's husband, Solkar was the captain of the Soval. If he is still alive, it will be pertinent for them to know that."

Chakotay nodded as he contemplated the complication that might possibly be awaiting the newlyweds. "Agreed. Have them meet us in the transporter room."

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"I have no reason to believe Solkar is still alive," Sadara said after being told that the Soval had been found on the planet below. "I felt my bond to him break at the moment of his death. In the unlikely event that some unexplained phenomenon severed or interfered with our bond, Solkar would have had to take another mate for reasons we're all aware of."

Commander Chakotay frowned slightly at her seemingly unfeeling attitude toward the possibility that her previous husband was alive. He rarely saw eye to eye with Tuvok and in general Vulcans befuddled him with their stoicism and outlook on life. And Sadara was said to be rather un-Vulcan in most respects. Apparently, this wasn't one of those instances.

"Look, I understand that if Captain Solkar was found alive that would complicate matters for you and Vorik, but I can't believe you'd rather he was dead."

"Of course I don't, but you're right. My marriage to Vorik could be legally nullified if Solkar is found alive."

Tuvok raised an eyebrow in mild annoyance. "Might I suggest that such speculation is illogical and counterproductive at this point. Until we know if Captain Solkar is indeed alive there is little point in speculating what actions should be taken."

Vorik, who had up to that point remained silent and almost melancholy for a Vulcan, finally chimed in. "I concur. We should see what the situation is in the Soval before speculating further."

Tuvok and Chakotay didn't miss the uncertain and apprehensive glance Vorik spared his new wife. His almost impassive face looked as if he expected his new marriage to be too good to be true and unravel just like his proposal to Lt. B'elanna Torres had not too long ago.

The four of them stepped up onto the transporter platform and Chakotay gave the nod to energize.

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They materialized on the crew deck, anticipating that the other areas might be of little use after so long and with the Soval grounded. Most of the Oberth class ship had weathered the crash landing well, but the ship had been rendered incapable of space flight. The all Vulcan crew likely modified the ship in ways to support living out the rest of their lives there.

Looking around the Voyager away team noted that the corridors of the old ship were in pristine condition, but there was no immediate sign of any of the crew nearby.

"Well it definitely doesn't look abandoned," Chakotay said. "I hope Vulcans don't shoot first and ask questions later."

That caused three Vulcan eyebrows to shoot for the sky at Chakotay's gallows humor.

"While our arrival is unexpected, I suspect that any crew members we encounter will allow us to state our intent prior to taking any action," Tuvok said, taking out his tricorder, then pointing. "I'm detecting 7 life signs 15 meters ahead."


	8. Ghosts of the Past

The away team was met by a group of young to early middle aged Vulcans, all of whom appeared to be members of the Soval's original crew. After over 40 years of being stranded on this mudball and with little hope of returning to Federation space, Chakotay idly wondered if any of the all Vulcan crew had paired off and had children; children who could even be adults at this point.

The Vulcans were armed and cautious, but relaxed slightly when they realized the intruders were of species they recognized.

"What little of our equipment still functions indicated Vulcan and Human life signs, but it was difficult, even for us, to believe the readings. I am Xoran. I was first officer of the Soval when it was still in service. I am rather surprised to see Starfleet personnel in the Delta Quadrant so soon."

Chakotay studied Xoran for a moment. He was slightly short for a Vulcan, perhaps about six feet tall and rather pale, though that was likely due to the limited exposure to natural sunlight for the last 40 years. The environment could support Vulcan life, but it was rather cold and the star dim compared to what most Vulcans were accustomed to. The shock of slightly unruly black hair and onyx eyes only emphasized how pale he was. The Vulcan exuded a weary authority, but his military bearing suggested his skills were as sharp as ever. Chakotay would have expected no less of a Vulcan.

He stepped forward. "I am Commander Chakotay of the starship Voyager. We were stranded here in the Delta Quadrant by an alien device. We detected the wreckage of the Soval and came to see if there were any survivors."

Xoran nodded. "94 out of a crew of 468 survived the initial crash. Over the years, others have perished from various circumstances. There is 71 of us now."

Xoran scanned the Vulcans with Commander Chakotay and his eyebrow rose when his weary eyes settled upon the familiar form of Sadara Lochlan. There was a flicker of something in the onyx orbs that the away team couldn't identify.

"Sadara… Solkar is alive, but you should know that he has taken another mate... for obvious reasons. He believed your bond to be broken."

Xoran's head tilted curiously at the young Vulcan male standing near Sadara. He had tensed at the news that Solkar still lived so Xoran could only guess he was Sadara's mate. His control, while adequate, was still imperfect owing to the young man's youth and really, only another Vulcan would have noticed the brief lapse.

"It is, though I'm not certain how if we are both alive," Sadara responded.

"Possibly an unknown phenomenon associated with the rift that brought the Soval to this region of space," Tuvok speculated.

"Makes sense to me. The bond broke at roughly the same time the Soval disappeared into the rift," Sadara nodded.

Chakotay could understand and sympathize with Sadara's situation, but the personal issues involved here would have to wait until Chakotay had established some sort of dialogue with this Captain Solkar.

"Is it possible for us to speak with Captain Solkar?"

"Of course," Xoran nodded. "This way."

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One of the few Oberth class starships not refitted with the captain's ready room, the away team was led to a small briefing room after Commander Xoran alerted Captain Solkar to the Starfleet away team's arrival.

Tuvok followed Chakotay, but glanced back briefly at the other two members of the away team. Outwardly, Sadara appeared composed, perhaps a little distracted and Ensign Vorik hovered protectively over her. He was likely sensing distressing emotions in his wife through their new bond. Voyager's security chief realized the difficult conflicting nature of Sadara's situation. To find a husband alive after thinking him long since dead would normally have brought unfathomable joy, but in her case, she had a brand new husband and had discovered the lost one had remarried. Certainly it wasn't joy she now felt, but conflict and uncertainty. Tuvok was certain that logic was the answer, but Sadara was given to the less emotionally tidy ways of humans and she would suffer for it here unless she found a way to embrace her Vulcan half quick, fast, and in a hurry.

Chakotay caught Tuvok's glace as they approached the briefing room and understood immediately. "Would you two prefer to remain outside for the moment?"

Sadara shook her head. "No. I've been through worse."

Chakotay's expression softened. "You're not the captain this time. You don't have to be super human."

"I know. I still need to do this."

Chakotay nodded to Xoran and followed him into the briefing room. A very tall and broad shouldered Captain Solkar stood near the chair at one end of the rectangular table. His arms were clasped behind his back and he appeared relaxed and patient. He was very much a Vulcan's Vulcan, calm, controlled, and reserved. He had a quiet charisma about him though and Chakotay immediately knew why he'd risen to command of a starship.

"Captain Solkar," Chakotay nodded.

"Commander Chakotay," Solkar inclined his head slightly in greeting and gestured to the chairs at the table.

Chakotay nodded to the officers with him. "Tuvok, chief of security, Ensign Vorik, one of our engineers, and I believe you know our ship's counselor, Sadara Lochlan."

Solkar's light brown eyes lingered on Sadara for a moment and the expression in them softened with remembered affection and warmth from their marriage. Next to her, the young Vulcan ensign's dark eyes turned hard and challenging as if silently daring Solkar to get between him and Sadara. Solkar, remarried himself, sought no challenge from the young man and averted his eyes, yielding to Vorik before focusing once again on Voyager's second in command.

Sadara noticed the exchange and cast her eyes downward. Without him saying a word, she knew that Solkar was not going to fight for what they had.

"Xoran told me that your starship was stranded here in the Delta Quadrant. The Soval was not brought here by the same means. We were caught in a rift or wormhole very near the gravity of this planet. Our engines were damaged in transit and we were unable to avert a crash landing. Unfortunately, the ship was rendered incapable of space flight at that point. The surviving members of my crew have endeavored to be as content with our lives here as possible. That said we would greatly appreciate passage aboard Voyager back to the Alpha Quadrant. In exchange, we would do our utmost to acquaint ourselves with the advances in technology since the Soval was lost and become productive members of Voyager's crew."

Chakotay clasped his hands in front of him and nodded. "If you would like, you and your first officer are welcome to accompany us back to Voyager to speak with Captain Janeway. I'm sure she'd be more than happy to work with you and your crew."

"That would be acceptable. Whenever you are ready, Commander Chakotay."

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It took nearly two days to have the remaining 71 members of the Soval's crew settled into what space there was aboard Voyager. Fortunately, as Vulcans they learned quickly so time was not wasted in bringing them up to speed on the latest in Starfleet technology, at least enough to get them comfortable.

For Sadara, it had to have been two of the longest days of her life. Solkar had been occupied, and logically so, with getting personal effects and other items needing to be moved organized and ready for transport to Voyager. Were she in his place, she would have done similar, but she wasn't. Still, the Vulcan/Human hybrid was anxious to discuss their personal situation.

She sat in her office on the third morning and peered out at the stars as the Intrepid class starship left orbit at full impulse, then leapt to warp speed. She had clients for much of the day as members of the Soval's crew had scheduled themselves to see her. Only compassion for the troubles of others would hold her concentration that day.

She glanced at the chronometer when the door chime signaled a visitor, noting that she wasn't due for her first client for nearly two hours.

"Come."

With a deep breath, she steeled herself to focus outwardly and turned.

"Solkar," she exhaled.

"Yes," he said softly and clasped his hands behind his back once again. "I regret that we reunite under such circumstances. Had I believed our bond to be intact and saw hope for returning to Federation space, I might have fought to return to you. I'm certain it would have been less complicated for you had you found me dead."

"In some ways. I have thought you dead for over 40 years. I even just remarried after I swore I never would again. I had tired of Starfleet making me a widow."

"I have also remarried and I am content with T'Ana. It would be illogical to forsake our current spouses simply to resume our marriage after 40 years of believing the other dead."

Sadara's eyebrows flew up into her bangs in stunned horror. Her heart felt as if it was being squeezed in a mighty fist and she felt as if she could hardly breathe.

"How can you say that? We discover each other alive after 40 years and that's all you have to say to me? Just more Vulcan logic?"

Solkar's jaw clenched imperceptibly. Dealing with her more emotional side could be trying, but dealing with it as he had 40 years prior was coming back as swiftly as if it had been just yesterday that he had endured the last of her stormy moods.

"My… feelings for you have not changed, but we have both moved on and found contentment with others. To disrupt two other lives for selfish reasons is illogical and reprehensible. You know this. Our children were grown before we returned to our lives aboard starships. We have no logical reason to continue as a married couple when we have both moved on."

She turned her back to him and remained silent. She could barely hear her own thoughts over the urgent maelstrom of her emotions. She knew Solkar though. He would not change his mind no matter how she pleaded, argued, or begged. Not that she'd ever resort to begging…

The part of Solkar that still loved her wanted to hold her, to comfort her, but he knew her as well and such an action would only bring her false hope. She had to realize that they were over and had been for four decades. Her future was with the young Vulcan engineer and the sooner she accepted that, the sooner she could get on with their life as a married couple. He didn't envy the young man the task of re-orienting his young marriage around his wife's former husband traveling on a long voyage aboard the same ship.

Perhaps he could help Vorik navigate the moody waters of life with Sadara.

"Sadara, you are aware that Vulcan law is clear in these rare cases. Because of the necessity of a mate during pon farr, the newer marriage is the legally recognized one. The instant the first of us took a new mate in pon farr, our marriage was legally dissolved whether we wished it or not. You have a young husband who will be depending on you to reconcile this within  
yourself, lest its effects on the bond destroy it. And your feelings for him are strong. Don't dispose of that bond out of some  
misguided loyalty to our past. I suggest you accept this and move on. This is the last we will speak of it."

Sadara said nothing and simply stared out at the stars until she heard the quiet hiss of her office doors closing behind Solkar and that part of her life.


End file.
